


The Hargreeves Take The Bahamas

by TheGirlWhoWearsBlack



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Dysfunctional Family, Family Bonding, Family Fluff, Five is getting dragged to this, Gen, I'll try to make it comedic, Light-Hearted, Post-Season 2, Slight Canon Divergence, The Hargreeves (Umbrella Academy) Need a Hug, Vacation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-24
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 01:08:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26078482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGirlWhoWearsBlack/pseuds/TheGirlWhoWearsBlack
Summary: "Feels like a great time to go to the Bahamas or something.” Five sassed with his head tilted to the right, chin up and popping, mocking eyes.“That’s actually a good idea."  Allison clapped once with excitement. “We could use some quality family time, relax and bond.”“I was being sarcastic.”
Relationships: The Hargreeves Family
Comments: 8
Kudos: 118





	1. The Talk

**Author's Note:**

> SPOILER ALERT!  
> Takes place right after season 2. Don't read if you haven't finished it.  
> For the purposes of this story, I eliminated Claire's existence, sorry Allison:( -she never existed, I didn't kill her.-  
> It has foul language, heavy drinking and mentions of violence. (Nothing that has never been said on the show itself.)  
> The first chapter has slight angst, but the rest of the story will be more light-hearted and focused on the Bahamas vacation and the Hargreeves not knowing how to be normal, haha.

Time travelling is not for the weak.

Many movies in the past have warned people about time travelling and its consequences. There’s also the science of it, but who actually pays attention to science when you got movies to explain the subject in a much simpler way?

One little thing, the slightest change of path, a single choice made differently can change absolutely everything.

Don’t believe it? Ask the Hargreeves.

_ “Home? This isn’t your home. This is the Sparrow Academy. _ ” Diego mocked Reginald’s words from a couple of minutes before he kicked the six of them out of the mansion that once was known to them as The Umbrella Academy. “Maybe if I go back and kick his ass his head will jitter out the memories of who the fuck we are.”

Diego looked at his brothers and sisters with fear disguised as anger.

The six were gathered at the living room in Vanya’s apartment, which was as it used to be to their surprise.

After leaving the mansion, the second they stepped foot past the gate, they all began watching their surroundings on their way to Vanya’s on an attempt to find what other changes happened thanks to their last trip to the past. Everything else in the city seemed pretty normal. Same cars, buildings, people, technological devices, same smell of trash with a mix of smog and the same chilly weather. It appeared to be that the only thing that changed was their family.

“What does that even mean?” Klaus dragged his words as he massaged his temples and laid on the couch.

Klaus’s whole body took the entire length of it, even had to crunch his legs to fit in leaving only the single sofa and two stools from the kitchen available to Diego, Allison and Vanya. Luther sat on the floor, being the only space he could comfortable sit in and Five stood by the apartment door.

“Sparrow Academy? Are those his new kids or something?” Luther questioned, his eyes were the ones of a lost puppy and didn’t match his bulky physique.

“Man, we don’t know anything more than you do.” Diego replied harshly, though his eyes reflected empathy.

“I thought we were his kids.” Vanya answered with her hands in her pockets, rocking herself back and forth anxiously. “Why would dad forget us?”

“We’re better off without him. Trust me, he was a very mean, evil, straight out of hell, sick, twisted son of a bitch.” Klaus chuckled and threw the cowboy hat he had stolen from the 60s through the air.

The garment landed in Allison’s lap who only glared back at her brother: “He’s still our dad, and we need to find out why he forgot about us.”

In that moment, Five, who had been just listening with a freakishly forced smirk that in no way could cover his frustration and rage, finally snapped at them.

“Dad didn’t forget about us, you morons. In fact, he remembers us so damn well he avoided us.”

“That doesn’t make any sense.” Diego hissed with such a tense jaw, words barely came out. “If you ask me, he’s playing dumb, as usual. Like Klaus said, dad’s a big son of a bitch, maybe this is one of his tests.”

The group nodded frantically agreeing with Number Two. All of them wanted to grasp at any possible explanation of why Reginald Hargreeves suddenly decided to ‘disadopt’ them and worse, pretend he had no idea of who they were.

They knew that their little trip to the 60s could do strange things to their temporal line, however, believing that their father was just testing them was easier than accepting that they had messed up, yet again. And this time, at their family’s expense. 

“He’s not ‘dad’ anymore Diego!” The boy shouted and approached his mentioned brother walking threateningly. “He never was in this new timeline.”

“But why?”

‘ _ Why? _ ’ That was the million dollar question. Though Vanya’s shy quiet voice was the one to express it, it was obvious that the six siblings were just as confused, puzzled and upset.

“My guess is that when he met us in the 60s he was disappointed about the way we turned out.”

Five explained, dropping his signature cockiness in his voice and switched it to a more compassionate tone in light of his brothers’ and sisters’ disrupted faces. The softness lasted only a few seconds because right after he got annoyed again solely by the memory of their failure. 

“I mean how couldn’t he be disappointed in us? Four is a junkie…”

“Hey, hey, hey! I’m sober.” Klaus sat straight on the couch.

“Since when?”

“Uhm…”

Five interrupted Klaus with a dismissive hand gesture. “Two has a savior complex.”

“I do not.” Diego shrugged his shoulders. “Saving JFK was merely about…”

“Three is-”

“Watch what you are going to say about me, Five.”

The boy rolled his eyes and bit the inside of his cheek. “Seven has a worse temper than mine and can’t handle pressure or stress.”

“Sorry.”

“Number One is literally a gigantic crying baby. I mean, look at him.”

Klaus, Allison, Diego and Vanya followed Five’s finger that pointed to Luther who had his knees crunched in his chest and his chin over them as he sobbed and then used the back of his hand to dry the wetness of his cheeks. Luther looked up at his siblings and pouted.

“I have so many emotions.”

“Man…” Diego cooed.

They expressed their empathy to Luther and tried to comfort him in various ways, saying whatever came to their minds in order to make him feel slightly better, without any success. They stared back at Five, exasperated at him for saying those things in such a turbulent time. Five only stood there watching carefully, apparently with no emotion in his visage until a big sigh left his lips.

“And Number Five is an arrogant man in the body of a 13 year old who messes everything up even more whenever he tries to fix things from our timeline.” The boy finally sat down by the newly cleared space at the couch by Klaus' side. Klaus lent and placed his head on Five’s shoulder tenderly. To everyone’s surprise, he didn’t fight back. “I think dad decided to carry on with his experiment using other subjects, therefore, Reginald Hargreeves never adopted us.”

For the first time, Five actually seemed conflicted, even sad. He was tired of trying to make things right for everyone, of trying to play a game that clearly was bigger than him. He just wanted to keep his family safe, and in the process he managed to destroy it.

“But that means we are not heroes anymore. It means I spent four years in the moon for nothing!”

Number One cried again, covering his face with his hands. Allison, who was seated in a chair by his side, stroked Luther’s back on an attempt to sooth him.

“Forget that, Luther. It means we are not siblings anymore.”

“Don’t say that Diego, we’ll always be family.” Allison nagged, still stroking Luther’s back who's crying went louder after Diego’s statement, and shook her head in disapproval.

“I can’t believe I’m agreeing with Klaus, but maybe we are better off without him.”

Klaus nodded with his eyes closed and used both his hands to press Five’s head against his, showing how much he appreciated Five for acknowledging he was right. 

“And, and maybe not being The Umbrella Academy is also a good thing.” Allison added. “We don’t have to worry about saving the world anymore. We can live a normal life.”

“Who knows how our lives are in this new timeline?” Diego pointed out as he melted in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. “For all we care maybe we don’t live in the same country or…”

“Who cares?” Allison laughed derisively . “We’re the same Hargreeves, only not really Hargreeves and without the weight of being The Umbrella Academy. Perhaps forgetting is the best thing we can do.”

“So we are supposed to look the other way if someone’s in trouble?” Diego raised his voice indignanated

“Well, the Sparrow Academy does seem to have everything under control.” Vanya responded before pursuing her mouth to the side. “They managed to keep Ben alive and avoid the Apocalypse, things we couldn’t pull off.”

“Is nobody else weirded out about Ben being alive without actually being Ben?” Klaus spoke as he let go of Five’s face.

The six grimaced and tilted their heads as they processed the fact that Number Six was alive in the new timeline yet he had no idea he was  _ their _ Number Six,  _ their _ beloved brother Ben. 

The heated conversation that the Hargreeves were having seconds ago, vanished within the air just like that. They all sat there, stared at each other’s faces, realization kicking in. 

Though Allison said they would always be family, not being adopted by the same eccentric millionaire did change things.

The mood in Vanya’s apartment felt heavy, somehow humid and gloomy. The family’s last time travel prevented the end of the world again, but ended theirs.

“What should we do now?”

“I don’t know Luther. We’re not heroes, we’re not siblings, and our new timeline lives are a mystery…Feels like a great time to go to the Bahamas or something.” Five sassed with his head tilted to the right, chin up and popping, mocking eyes.

“That’s actually a good idea. We’ve had a rough couple of years, months and days.” Allison clapped once with excitement. “We could use some quality family time, relax and bond.”

“That’s a terrible idea.”

“Don’t be like that, Diego. It could be fun.” Vanya accepted as a grin appeared in her face. “We’ve never done anything like that before.”

“No way, it really doesn’t feel like the right time to do that, we need to sort a bunch of things out.” Luther opposed the idea that had her sisters excited. “We don’t have money to pay for such things.”

“I can rumor us our way to the Bahamas.”

“Boom, done.” Klaus cheered and stood up, rubbing his hands against each other. “Let’s ignore all of our problems and responsibilities by getting drunk at the beach. Yay!”

Diego threw at him a random magazine he got from the shelf behind him, making Klaus squeak as a complaint. Vanya disappeared into her bedroom not saying a word. When she came out, she was carrying her laptop. She sat at the same spot she was before and typed something in the computer, then showed the rest the screen. “Check out this resort, guys.”

“Ugh, imagine…white sand, teal ocean, golden sun, spa, unlimited drinks, and crystalline pool. We need this.” Allison grabbed the laptop from Vanya and scrolled through the pictures, each time she sighed yearningly and over dramatically. She placed her eyes in each and one of her siblings: “You know? I could just rumor you into going.”

“Don’t look at me, I’m on board already. You got me at ‘Bahamas’.” Klaus affirmed and left to the kitchen in search of a snack, or a drink. Preferably a drink.

“I’m not really a ‘beach type of guy’.”

“You look like one with your Antonio Banderas’s hair.” Four shouted at Diego all the way from the kitchen and immediately regretted it when he felt another magazine crashing against his back. “Not cool.”

Diego focused again on Allison and the pictures of the resort Vanya found. His mouth began to water when a picture of the five star restaurant meals popped, followed by infinite cocktails, and a bright, sunny beach. He had it especially rough with Lila betraying him and leaving him. Perhaps going to the Bahamas with his family wasn’t such a terrible idea.

“Fine. But I won’t do cheesy matching shirts and stuff like that.”

Allison screeched and jumped several times before throwing her arms around Diego’s neck and hugged him tightly. At first he tried to fight it but yielded, as he melted in his sister’s arms.

Luther noticed the embrace. A tint of jealousy stung his stomach. He felt out of place being the only one that was opposed to Five’s marvelous idea of going to the Bahamas. Allison was very happy and excited, even Vanya was widely smiling.

“Alright. We’ll all go.”

“You’re in too, Luther?”

“Yeah…it’s not so bad of a plan”

For the second time, Allison squealed eagerly and ran towards Luther to hold him.

“I’ll be in charge of the itinerary though.”

“Suit yourself, big boy.”

Luther chuckled and hugged Allison back. Vanya joined behind them, holding both at the same time. Klaus skipped some steps from the kitchen to the living room and joined the hug, careful not to drop his freshly served glass of wine.

“The Hargreeves family is taking the Bahamas.”

Klaus chanted and extended his hand to Diego, inviting him in. Number Two rolled his eyes before yielding to the group hug.

“Five?” Vanya’s voice called him. "Come on, this was your idea!" 

The boy had been observing the entire thing from the comfort of the couch. His face was emotionless, his jaw tensed in a way his dimples showed. Five found it scary yet somehow amusing how easy it was to influence his brothers and sisters. His five siblings watched him expectantly with big hopeful eyes and ear to ear smiles: “I was being sarcastic.”


	2. The Airport Vol.1

Five never thought that his sarcastic words during times of crisis for the Hargreeves were going to be taken seriously by his siblings. Sarcasm was created not to be taken seriously, yet somehow his stupid, rat-brained siblings managed to fail even in detecting it. He was just being his regular self; an ass to his brothers and sisters and pretty much everyone else.

His hostile nature insisted on him fighting them back and refuse to join them in the stupid trip to the Bahamas. He was going to tell them off, really, but something about their faces and the way they all were staring back at him, somehow stopped Five from breaking their hearts. 

Ugh, he hated when his softy side made an appearance. 

Maybe it was the fact that for the first time in a while Luther seemed excited about something, Diego wasn’t worrying about anyone else but himself, Allison could finally say ‘fuck it’ and forget her duties, that Klaus had his mind off his apparent permanent state of bring tormented, and that it was going to be the first family activity Vanya was included in.

Five also realized that it was going to be the first time in decades that he was going to be able to chill out and get a decent night of sleep. It was going to be the first time since he came back from the future that he could catch up with his family without worrying about the end of the world.

It came to a point where he could barely remember why it was a bad idea not to go. The pros seemingly outweighed the cons. 

As he waited at JFK airport, surrounded by his brothers and sisters, with no tickets, no money, or even luggage, Five began to remember why he was opposed to the trip.

“Do you think she’ll be able to pull it off?” Diego asked Luther in the form of a whisper while Allison approached an airline desk.

Ever since Allison landed in the early 60s, she promised herself not to use her powers. She felt that her life in her real timeline was all fake, a product of her gift, thus, being stranded in the 60s gave her a clean slate to start from scratch. For a time she was content with her own achievements and felt no need to rumor anything. Allison was aware that it was a slippery slope, once she started using them again. She had to be cautious during this trip, especially since mostly everything was going to be obtained thanks to her rumors.

She approached the airline’s main desk, glancing rapidly at her very dated, worn outfit. She would’ve loved to change but none of Vanya’s clothes fit and there was no time to go shopping. Allison wanted to get the tickets to the Bahamas before her siblings could change their minds. She brushed her index finger against her fringe, trying her best to look as presentable as possible. Just a few hours early, she had been in an intense, weird battle against the Commission, she, as well as the rest of the Hargreeves, looked wrecked. 

“Hi.” She greeted the lady on the other side of the desk with her signature charming Allison Hargreeves smile. “I was wondering if there were any flights to Nassau for tonight.”

The attendant, who had been looking at the monitor in front of her, started typing something.

“Excuse me?”

“Yes ma’am, we have a flight schedule for…”

The woman finally looked up, her jaw dropped a few centimeters when her eyes met Allison in front of her.

“Oh my god, you are Greta from ‘ _ Married to My Boss’ _ .”

Allison couldn’t help but to knit her brows together, the gears of her brain turned trying to make out if she had been in a movie named ‘ _ Married to My Boss’ _ or played any character named Greta. When she realized she had been immersed in her own head for more than a minute, she came back to it. Confusion still spread across her face.

“‘ _ Married to My Boss’ _ ?”

“Yeah, the soap opera from channel 6? Stellar time.”

Soap opera? Allison Hargreeves was not a soap opera actress. Was she?

She squinted her eyes and tilted her head, unable to process this new information. She could literally feel the gears once again working hard to understand. Then it hit her. This was a new timeline, a new reality in which they had no idea what they turned out to be. Apparently she now had an idea.

Allison Hargreeves was no longer a movie star. At least she was still in the entertainment industry.

“Yeah, totally.” Allison finally yielded, smiled and faked slapped her head. “I’m sorry, it’s been a rough couple of days. I’m her…I’m Allison Hargreeves from ‘ _ Married to My Boss _ ’.”

“Hargreeves? I thought your last name was Davies.”

“The flights to Nassau, please. Six seats.”

Allison changed the topic back to the Bahamas for two reasons; one: the clock was ticking and she could see from the corner of her eye that her brothers and sister were already getting fidgety as they waited, and two: she didn’t want to deal with the awkwardness of not having a clue of what the attendant was talking about.

“Oh, for six. Lemme check again, then.”

The attendant typed on the computer. “Only one flight with six seats available for tonight. It’s departing in five hours’ time and they are all first class tickets. That’d be $3,870.”

“Did I mention one is a minor?”

If Five heard her, he would kill her, not before yelling that he is the oldest of them all. However she didn’t care. Allison thought that taking advantage of Five’s juvenile appearance was actually a good move. 

“Oh, great. That brings it down to $3,829. Credit, debit or cash?”

“Rot in hell.”

Allison whispered at the high cost. Deviated her gaze from the attendant before gathering the will to rumor her. She seemed like a nice lady, which made it hard for Allison to push her to give her the free tickets. “I heard a rumor that these tickets are a gift from the airline for me and my siblings.”

Though at first disoriented, the eyes of the attendant turned grayish and cloudy as Allison’s rumor got to her head,then they cleared and a robotic grin appeared in her face. “Well, look at that. Tickets are on the house Miss Davies. Six first class tickets to Nassau 9:30pm, five adults and a minor.”

“That’s wonderful, thank you very much.”

After giving the attendant all the info necessary, the boarding passes were printed. Allison grabbed them from the attendant’s hand triumphantly. Thanked her again and went back to meet her anxiously looking siblings.

God, the Hargreeves just didn’t know how not to be always after an urgent manner.

“Got them.” Allison informed, waving the paper in front of each of their noses.

Diego grabbed one and read the contents of it. “It leaves in five hours. I say we go and come back in four hours. We don’t even have to check any bags in.”

Everyone nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, maybe I can find a bit more of who I am in this timeline.” Luther announced.

“About that, apparently I am a soap opera actress now.”

“Really?” Klaus glared at his sister with awe. “You know, I can actually see that. You are kind of over dramatic queen.”

“We are not going to leave each other’s side.” Five snapped as he placed himself in the middle of the little circle they had made. “You idiots have proven to be unfit to get places on time, even when life itself depended on it. There’s no way this time I’m letting you out of my sight.”

“You’re talking about the time you had to make a deal with the Handler to get us out of the 60s and only I showed up?”

Five turned over his heels with his hands on the pockets of his uniform. He lifted his chin, his jaw clenched so hard it seemed his eyes were about to pop out of his orbits. “What does your monkey brain tell you, Luther?”

“Hey, Ben and I got there too, didn’t we?”

“Man, don’t hold it against us. Circumstances were hard.” Diego interjected, shrugging his shoulders. “I don’t know...I was being fucking  _ kidnapped _ by Lila.”

“And I was being attacked by vacuum salesmen that turned out to be hit-men.”

“I got pulled over by the cops.” Vanya added with soft nodding.

She seemed almost mindless about exactly what happened after. The looks of the rest made her continue talking: “And then almost caused another apocalypse. Sorry.”

Five’s cynic eyes were encouragement enough for them to assess their excuses.

“Yeah, maybe we should stick together.” Vanya spoke up, earning soft hums of agreement from the rest.

The six remained silent, a few scowls and grimaces popped in their faces as they remembered every single time they had messed up on their own and as consequence, failed their brothers and sisters.

“Alright, but we have five hours to kill. What should we do?” Klaus passed his arms around Diego and Luther's necks. “I was thinking, hear me out, we take a watermelon, some vodka, nail polish and two to three condoms…”

“Please, don’t.” Diego cut him off and shimmied his brother’s arm off from him. “Why do you have to say those kinds of things?”

“Let’s check in, and get something to eat.” Allison tried to be the voice of reason before a fight erupted. “This airport is huge, we certainly can find something to do.”

The Hargreeves gave in and followed Allison to security. She gave the security guard all of the boarding passes. He gave them a swift read and said without looking at her: “Passports.”

“Here.” Klaus waltzed to Allison’s side and handed the guard a stack of passports.

Before getting to the airport, they decided that they needed some sort of ID. They had no clue of who they were in the new timeline so they could come up with anything they’d like. The only one who had a legit ID was Vanya, who was still first name Vanya but last name Petrova, Russian nationality with a permit to live in the States.

Luckily Klaus had contacts. He was used to mingling with some sketchy people in order to get something to get high with. One of his old dealer-buddies also dabbled in forging documents. They made a technical stop at Klaus’s buddy’s office –which was a dark alley- so they could get new passports.

Since Klaus’s old buddy recognized him and even called him by his name, Four inferred his name was still Klaus, and that in this timeline he managed to also be a junkie.

The guard began matching boarding passes with passports. Then began calling their names checking that the person in the picture matched the documents. All of them were easily cleared, except for Five.

“It says here you’re 31.” The guard accused, switching from the passport to the boy in front of him. “Care to explain?”

“I’m actually over 60 years old, asshole.” Five squinted and smiled sweetly in a way his cheek dimples showed. “I got stuck in this stupid body of a 13 year old boy when I travelled back in time to stop the apocalypse.”

The remaining Hargreeves stood on the other side, already stripping from their metal belongings in order to go through the metal-detector.

“You wrote Five was born in 1989?” Diego growled at Klaus’s ear.

Four squealed at the closeness. “It is his birthday, isn’t it?”

“You do realize he looks a lot younger than us?”

“I mean, yes, but when I was trying to do the math, I couldn’t ‘cause you guys were pressuring us to hurry and I drank all of Vanya’s wine…”

“You drank all of my wine?” Vanya turned with subtle resentment in her visage. “Klaus, that was expensive!”

“2006.” Diego stated over Vanya’s complaint.

“What?”

“To be 13 Five must’ve been born in 2006. It’s no rocket science, genius.”

“At least I tried to do something productive and got us passports.”

Klaus pushed Diego’s shoulder using only his index finger, making him take a step back from lack of steadiness and stepped on the foot of the man behind him in line. The man pushed Diego back, making him trip over Klaus.

The line of people trying to go through to security had been growing behind them as they argued about the passport. Five still nowhere to be seen.

Allison tried to go back with Five, jumping over Two and Four laying in the ground, but was pushed by the people in line to move forward. Luther noticed and called out the man who pushed Allison, who only came back at him. Diego stood up and yelled at the guy who pushed him, then at the one who pushed his sister, only to end up trying to prevent Luther from swinging his fist into someone. Soon other men and women in line, tired of waiting for the siblings to go past the metal-detector, got involved. Suddenly it turned into a mini war of name calling, pushing and yelling.

The security guards had to intervene and threatened to not allow them into the airport if they didn’t behave or if they didn’t go through the metal detector once and for all. Not wanting to mess things further, the siblings finally yielded and went through security.

“Bravo, Diego. You almost got us kicked off the airport.” Luther complaint. “What a leader.”

Two turned to face One, stiff face, deadly dark eyes. “Oh shut up you scruples-lacking giant! You were the one who was going to punch the shit out of the dude that pushed Allison.”

“Hey, calm down fellas” Four’s amused voice interrupted Two’s. “We don’t want Vanny here to get all worked up and destroy the world for the millionth time.”

Four squeezed Seven’s shoulders tightly making her neck disappear into her torso from the sudden touch.

“Once! I’ve destroyed the world once!”

Vanya caught all of her siblings’ attention, who turned to her with disdain and disbelief. All of them mentioned moments when she almost destroyed the world and the time she actually did.

“You guys are missing the point. We need to help Five.” Allison intervened. 

“With what?”

Five appeared by their side, sucking from a straw in a big cup of cherry flavored slushy. They all parted their mouths in shock when they saw the boy so chilled out with a frozen drink in his right hand, his left in his pocket, and his signature cocky smile. 

The last time they saw him, he was being interrogated by the guard about his age and the discordance of his birthday with his physique.

“How?” Luther was the brave one to ask.

Not that asking a question required balls. What required balls was asking a question to Five. He was certainly going to make you feel and know how much of a dumb idiot you are for asking something that was terribly obvious to him. Meaning, whomever asked, was most likely to be insulted relentlessly by Five.

“Unlike you dingbats, I know how to make the best out of my powers.”

They stared back at Five, not really sure of what he meant.

“Oh my fucking Hell! I can do spatial jumps, ass-clowns! I just told the guard I was going to leave and then transported me past security.” He yelled exasperated, squeezing his cherry slushy so hard the cap came off and some liquid dripped over the cup. “Why do I even try?”

After a few ‘Oh’s, some nods and a complete dismissive attitude towards Five’s recent tantrum, Allison clapped her hands. “So, who wants some food?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Hargreeves are getting closer to the Bahamas, haha. 
> 
> Hope you liked it! Comments are very much appreciated:)  
> Thanks for reading!


	3. The Airport Vol.2

Food court had been paradise for the Hargreeves. After spending so much time trapped in the 60s, the usual fast food from modern times felt like nectar from the Olympus. They munched to Chipotle, Panda Express, Wingstop and then drank Starbucks. All of them were things they took for granted and that was taken away from them in a matter of seconds.

Food was just a smallness compared to other issues the 60s had: lack of technology in general, and basic human rights for those who were slightly different. If the 21 st century had issues with racism, sexism and homophobia, the 60s were out of the roof. 

“We look like trash.”

“You look like trash, Diego, I am digging this goth, rockstar type of look I got.”

Klaus took the napkin dispenser and focused on the mirror-like surface of it as he sent kisses to his own reflection.

“We smell like trash.” Vanya grimaced.

“That, I agree.” Four slammed the napkin dispenser and pointed at Vanya. “Ideas?”

The six siblings stared at each other, then at different points of the food court trying to think.

“Oh, I got it.”

Vanya pointed at their boarding passes, which were wrapped by an airline brochure. Allison scanned the paper and then smiled with satisfaction. “Airline lounge has showers, and since we’re first class…”

“Sounds good.” Diego clapped his hands and stood up, taking his jacket from the backrest of the chair.

“But wait.”

“What?” Two turned back annoyed at Luther.

“We can’t shower and put on these stinky clothes back on again.”

“Like you care.”

“I do.”

“Here’s an idea.” Allison yelled slightly in order to get her brothers’ attention over the ruckus of New York’s busy airport. “Let’s go shopping.”

They were a few hours to kill before getting on the plane and they were all wearing blood stain clothes from the 1960s. If they wanted to go to the Bahamas in style, shopping was the only right answer. Though shopping was not necessarily one of the Hargreeves’ favorite activities, even they knew that they desperately needed new clothes, thus, there was little to no protests at all.

Allison used her trick to get the siblings whatever they wanted to whatever store they were to. Several ‘ _ classic-dad-tropical-print _ ’ shirts in a size 3XL, a cool pair of blue-frame sunglasses, a fanny pack and a pair of slippers. Almost everything black for Diego, except for the bright and patterned pair of swimming shorts he practically fell in love with. A mix of flowy-wrappers and bottoms, see-through tops, tight bathing suits and variety of accessories, from hats, jewelry and sunglasses for Klaus. Allison got herself beautiful sundresses, high-waisted shorts, various tops she had missed wearing, two one-piece bathing suits and a hat that matched with Klaus’s, though she didn’t know until it was too late.

For the first time in a long time, the Hargreeves were having some chill time. Looking at clothes, trying on stuff even if they thought it was ridiculous, just for the pleasure of making fun of each other. They all seemed to be having a great time. One, Two, Tree, Four…but not Five or Seven.

Vanya tried to join the others in their fun and mess, however, whenever she tried, she caught Five, sitting at a corner of whichever store they were in, knees up to his chest and his chin over the knees, from the corner of her eye. He almost looked like an actual kid instead of an old-man trapped in a small body. Vanya felt bad for him.

The guy had spent the majority of his life trying to save the world from an apocalypse that already happened. It was as if there was nothing else in his life to look forward to, no motive, no anything. Vanya knew what it was like to feel a void, she always felt as if there was no place she belonged in, all and all she could always turn to music whenever that feeling invaded her. Five didn’t even have that. He left the civilized world before he could even get the chance to find out who he really was, not who Reginald Hargreeves wanted him to be, but who Five yearned to become. After that, he was reduced into being a hitman. Nothing more. 

“Hey, I saw you haven’t picked anything yet.”

Vanya dared to sit down by Five’s side, squeezing him against the wall and a clothing rack. He glimpsed at her for a second before he went back to stare at nothing.

“I’m good, thanks.”

“Five, you are not good, you can’t wear your Umbrella Academy uniform to the Bahamas. You need some short shorts, a swimsuit, t-shirts, flip-flops...”

“Flip-flops?”

Five furrowed his brow and tensed his jaw at the mention of the last item. Him wearing flip-flops? No fucking way.

“Or whatever shoewear appropriate to wear at the beach.”

“Thanks, Vanya, but it doesn’t sink right with me how much Allison is using her powers to benefit ourselves with material stuff.”

This time, it was Vanya who knit her brows together, a small chuckle slipped her mouth giving away she was more amused than surprised. “Since when did you get so moral-oriented?”

The boy took a moment to think about his answer, words didn’t come out, making Vanya to brush off her own question. She was almost certain that Five’s issue wasn’t Allison abusing her powers, it was something deeper, nonetheless, she also knew that navigating those touchy subjects with the most hostile and cynic of her siblings was not a good idea, especially a few hours before they all got inside a plane for a family trip at the Bahamas.

“I have some money of my own I found stashed away in my apartment, I can buy some things for you, Five.”

“I rather you spend your money on yourself than me. I’ll do just fine in these.”

The two took a glimpse of Five’s worn out, dirty, blood covered, distressed Umbrella Academy uniform. They scrunched their noses involuntarily and without noticing the other was doing the same.

“Bullshit, come on!”

Vanya jumped to get to her feet, then extended her hand in Five’s direction for him to take. He hesitated at first but ultimately gave in, just as he found himself constantly doing recently.

Five thought it was easier to go along with whatever his siblings said than putting up a fight to get his way. He was exhausted, both mentally and physically. For most of the Hargreeves it had been years, months between the 2019 Apocalypse and the 1963 end of the world, for him, it had only been a matter of days, bringing all the craziness to a total of two weeks. If yielding to his siblings' wishes was going to give him so much deserved peace, then he was going to do so.

Buying clothes was something Five had never done before. All his childhood was spent in Umbrella Academy uniforms, then he got stuck in the apocalypse where he wore whatever scraps that fitted, and when he was working for the Commission, the suits he wore were given to him. Choosing what to wear was a new experience for him, and he had no idea of where to start.

Given that Vanya was not the most fashionable of the Hargreeves, Five didn’t trust much of her opinion, nevertheless, he did not want to ask Klaus or Allison for styling advice, on account of the fact that they were probably going to tease him relentlessly. Going on what the models in the ads were wearing was his best option.

Five hated to think that he had to wear something dumb from the children section, however, it was the only thing that fitted, and after trying it on, it actually didn’t look so bad. He was already used to wearing shorts, the shirts and t-shirts were new, but not a bad combo in his opinion. The only thing that made him gag with disgust were the shoes. He would never completely understand the appeal of those ugly, plastic, shapeless masses, so called ‘Crocs’. All and all, Crocs were slightly better than flip-flops. At least he was able to add his personal touch with a number 5 pin and another one with a cup of coffee.

Being the last ones to begin shopping, they were the last ones to finish. Luther, Diego, Allison and Klaus had already hit the showers of the lounge and changed. Vanya and Five were the last ones to shower and get ready as the others waited at the lounge’s bar, ready to get the party started.

“Thank you for everything.”

“Sure, it’s just some clothes.”

“I mean for being the only one who actually worried and wanted me back when I was gone.”

Five could literally feel his tongue corroding as he pronounced those words. At the end of the day, Vanya was weirdly the one he trusted most to talk sentimental crap like that.

“Everyone wanted you back.”

The boy scrunched his lips together in a sad beam. They probably did, though eventually forgot. Five knew it was wrong to feel that way, but he couldn’t help it. He knew Reginald Hargreeves enough to be sure that he pushed all of them to move on from him as fast as they could in order to fulfill their duties as heroes. All except for Vanya.

“Pogo told me about how you left snacks in the kitchen for me to eat and the lights on in case I ever found my way home. Peanut butter and marshmallows are my favorite.”

“I know.”

The two mirrored the same half-smile in each other’s faces. Five’s faded first, and his eyes went down to the floor beneath him.

“I’m sorry for being a dick to you, Vanya. I know I am an asshole with everyone but I feel like I have disappointed you the most.”

Vanya narrowed her eyes and tilted her head slightly to the side trying to adjust her hearing. Was Five actually apologizing? Was this only Five’s characteristic sarcasm? When the boy didn’t go further and his gaze never met hers, she knew he was being truthful and that it was probably costing him every pinch of his proudness. “It’s ok, you didn’t disappoint me, trust me.”

Five nodded before he got wrapped in Vanya’s arms. She felt his muscles tensed underneath her, then slowly relaxing as he gave in. After a few seconds, Five pulled apart. “If you tell anyone about what just happened I swear to God I’ll cause an apocalypse myself and this time I won’t save your ass.”

Seven cracked a laugh as Five stared at her frowning and with a tensed jaw. It was then that she made sense that he wasn’t kidding. So much for a sincere, bonding brother-sister moment. 

“You guys are ready?” Klaus' loud yet draggy voice filled the locker room. He stationed himself with his back resting in the wall. “Allison wanted me to get you for some picture or something… Oh hey Five, nice shorts.”

Four snorted while sliding his sunglasses through the bridge of his nose for a better view of Five’s outfit. He didn’t blink yet he had Five already standing over one of the benches in front of him to get near his height. Five’s skinny, boney, index finger pointed Klaus’s chin at the same time he lowered his brother’s face to meet him by pulling his shirt.

“Don’t. You. Even. Dare.”

“Oh, don’t mind me, I love them. Nice change from that awfully outdated uniform. But just wait for Luther and Diego to see it.”

Vanya suppressed her laughter again while Klaus grinned mockingly. The three left the locker room in order to meet the rest that were waiting for them at the lounge’s bar. As expected, the first thing to reach Five’s ears was: “Woah, woah, there Five!” and other sorts of teasing all the way from across the room.

Five transported himself near them and kneed their crotches without hesitation, earning several complaints and moans of pains from One and Two. “We should’ve known.” Luther added, speaking through his suffering.

“Yes you should’ve.”

The corners of Five’s lips went up in his signature cocky smirk. Opening up to Vanya was too much sweetness from his end, now he had to balance it out by being a dickhead to his other siblings.

“Guys! Look at these!”

Allison approached them as she carried a big transparent bag filled with what it appeared to be several, similar-looking tops. She got one of them out and proudly displayed it. It was a tie-dye tee in orangey tones. Simple.

“They were selling them by the bulk and I thought it would be a cute idea if we…”

“No.”

Luther, Diego, Klaus, Vanya and Five said at unison before Allison could even finish telling her idea. She didn’t have to, they could all see the identical shirts in the clear bag she was holding. It was a no brainer.

“Yes.” Allison lifted her chin daringly and raised her eyebrow, hoping it was enough to convince her siblings.

“No.”

Not another second went by after they all refused, they felt their heads being surrounded almost like in a mist and their judgment getting cloudy. When they managed to snap out of it, and their reflection in the big glass window behind them caught their eye, they saw they were wearing the ugly orange tie-dye tee. It became obvious that Allison had  _ persuaded _ them in the way she knew best. 

“I said I wasn’t doing matching shirts.”

“Come on, Diego! It’s just for a pic.” Allison practically begged and showed the instant camera she got earlier in the day. “You can change into whatever you want afterwards.”

“That was my sole condition. No. Matching. Shirts.”

Diego looked down to the garment and scowled.

“These aren’t so bad.” Luther admitted with a significant higher key in his voice than before, causing all the Hargreeves to stare back at him with incredulity.

“I low key love them, maybe with a flowy skirt, cut the sleeves off, turn it into a tank top, ugh.”

Klaus approached the closest reflective surface and began rolling the sleeves, picturing how his vision would look like.

“It is so bad.” Diego complained again and this time tried to take his off.

“Stop being whiny babies. Even Five is wearing his.”

Allison pointed at Five who had also the tee nearly completely off his body. 

“Please! One pic, just one and then you can wear whatever the heck you want. Don’t make me rumor you again, please.”

Luther groaned as he nodded and slapped Diego’s back, calling his attention. He readjusted his own shirt aggressively and then turned to Five, pulling his back on. 

“What the fuck, man?”

“If I have to wear it, you have to wear it too.” Diego hissed with narrow eyes.

“It’s just a pic, it’s not going to kill us.” Vanya intervened in a soft tone. “It’s probably going to be the first pic we have all as a family.”

“Aw, Vanny.”

Klaus passed her arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer as he dramatically pouted. “I say we all stop being dramatic bitches and take the damn picture.”

Allison smiled satisfied and prepared the camera to give it to the first person that came near them. An older woman entered the lounge and walked in their direction. 

“Ma’am, do you mind taking a picture of us?”

“Sure thing.” She responded kindly and grabbed the camera from Allison’s hand. “Now, all of you, scoot together, come on.”

A few cursing and complaints flew in the air while the six Hargreeves positioned themselves for the picture.

“On the count of three. One”

“Five, no spatial-jumping, please. If you do it, I’ll know and we’ll retake it until each and one of us is in there.”

Allison threatened, her hand clutched Five’s shirt behind him on an attempt to keep him still. Five gave her a phony sympathetic nod with a just as fake, innocent smile. 

“Two.”

“Smile everyone. Smile my dear family!” Klaus teased the rest filled with amusement. “Woo hoo!”

“I don’t do ‘smiles’.” Diego grunted.

“Yes you do.” Allison nagged him again and whispered: “Smile or I’ll end y’all.”

“Three!”

_ Click.  _

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed the first part! Let me know what you think!


End file.
